winter friends

i think sometimes, the problem is that i live my life in lyrics.

Fuck Yeah Progress!!!

i LOVE these guys and you should, too! in fact, i love them so much that for every person who reblogs this, i will follow your tumblr even if i hate your posts. true story! 

for every person who goes to http://anaestheticanaesthetic.bandcamp.com/ and buys any of the albums ($4 minimum, otherwise a pay-what-you-want concept) and sends me some screenshot proving the purchase, i will happily promote your tumblr as many times as dollars you spend on the music. 

GO. DO. HEAR. BUY. LOVE. NOW. 

blackcatalystrecords:

An Aesthetic Anaesthetic is getting some international love this weekend.

Kerrang! Radio in the UK will be playing them on Sunday night.

AHHHHH!!! <3 <3 <3 Congrats boys!!! <3 <3 <3

things happen

occasionally, good things do happen to me. they’re so few and far between that they seem extra great when they come along. something i’ve really needed happened today and i am beyond ecstatic. still a long way to go, though, so lots of work to be done for the next few days and beyond. 

in other news, all this stress i’ve been under lately has caused my totally batshit crazy side to resurface at all the wrong times and i think i may have permanently fucked everything up with a certain friend. if life doesn’t make you insane, love certainly will. i really wish he could understand how much he means to me and how desperately i want him in my life. maybe then he could be more forgiving of my freakouts. i just really want some attention from him and when i need him to be my friend most, he’s never available. i know, logically, i should just cut my losses and call it done, but there’s too much history and too much of a pull. i can’t forget how we used to be or how he was my best friend. i can’t make myself believe that guy isn’t still in there somewhere. i miss him so much it sometimes feels like he’s dead. 

okay, back to the trying to be positive. time to get ready to go meet up with someone. i’ll just keep repeating to myself, “Soon you will have everything you could ever want. Keep trying.” fingers crossed, y’all.

a love of xanax and booze

i can have just enough of each that when i do something as simple as brushing my hair out of my face or applying lotion to my hands just feels almost as comforting as having someone i love gently caressing my skin. plus, the xanax is prescribed (to me), so i don’t even have to go seeking it illegally. if not for the passing out early and unexpectedly, it would be the most pleasant, legal sensation i could get all on my own.